Finding My Bavarian Roots: Geneaology Blogging Prose

UPDATED 2 October, 2024: Wir werden in Falkenberg bei Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz, Bayern, Deutschland,  8-12 Okt., 2024 sein.  We will be in Falkenberg, Bavaria, October 8-12, 2024. Siehe neue Familien Namen unten! See new family names below.
UPDATED FEB. 15, 2022, with new information. (see below)

From July 16, 2016, 1:09 pm: As I write this, I’m shedding tears of joy and disbelief. Since my high school days (1973-74) I’ve tried to find the KUHNS family link to “the old country” (Germany). I would take the bus during my high school and college years, during the summer, down to the Milwaukee County Historical Society, to do census and resident research.
I discovered that my grandfather George’s father, John, was a carpenter at the Pabst Theater. I learned that John’s father, Eugene, lived in Milwaukee, and was born in Germany.
So I kept trying and trying to find how Eugene “came over” from Germany, and where in Germany he was from. My research in Milwaukee — which spanned decades — always came up with only “Germany” as his birthplace.
Three years ago, I learned — through census records — that Eugene and several of his siblings had lived in Hartford, Washington County. I went to the Hartford Library and historical society, where some volunteers helped me find several newspaper articles about some KUHNS family. I made copies of the articles, but as I was short on time, I never really read them. In fact, I thought they were probably NOT related to me, because they mentioned another John KUHNS who was an early settler of Hartford, builder and owner of the “Old Wisconsin House” (aka “American House”) So I put the newspaper articles away in deep storage.
Eventually, I discovered that Eugene’s father, John, and his mother, Victoria, were buried in Hartford. At the time, I wrote this piece:
https://cyranowriter.wordpress.com/2015/09/12/six_generations_later_they_done_good/.

Alas, all censuses of this family simply said “Germany” as their residence before coming to the USA. I was still no closer to finding WHERE in Germany the Kuhns line came.
Recently, I pulled the articles out and brought them to Wisconsin. They sat on the bunkbed for months, as I only glanced at the headlines: “Old Settler Dead” and “Death of John Kuhns”.
Today, I brought them out and showed them to my father, who read them with interest. They talked of John Kuhns’ (Grandpa’s great-grandfather, NOT his father) life in the mid-1800’s in Hartford, builder and owner of the Wisconsin House / American House. But again, I never read the articles.
As I took them back into my room, for some reason, I decided to completely read them. I read of John and Victoria’s son Matthias, who died fairly young. I read of my grandfather’s grand-uncle, from Madison.

I read of the death of “the Old Settler” John Kuhns, the first Kuhns from our family in Wisconsin.
JohnKUHNS_KUNTZ_KUNZ_HartfordPressObitMarch1903Then I read this:
“The deceased was born in Falkenberg, Germany, in 1810.”
I stared.

In the next article on the copied page was this line: “Mr. Kuhns was born in Bavaria …. 1810 … and came to this country … in 1845.”
Falkenberg. Bavaria. Germany.
There is a town. A name. My KUHNS/KUNTZ line has a location.
FALKENBERG in Oberpfalz, Bavaria.
OR is it THIS Falkenberg, only a few miles north of where I studied German in Ebersberg, at the Goethe Institut?
Four decades of research flash into a time warp of insight and inspiration, take me back to the old country, 50 kilometers east of a city I spent a cold November night in 1980.

Schwetze mi UrGrossEltern Boarisch? Wiss nid!

But my Kuhns/Kuntz family line seems to have a home in Falkenberg, Oberpfalz, Bavaria, Germany, northeast of Munich, east of Nuremberg, near the Czech border.
And I’m in tears.
PS: In the same article: “He was married in the old country, Feb. 2, 1836, to Victoria Mormk.”
More information, a last name we never knew before.——

PPS: Not so fast: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Falkenberg-Lower-Bavaria/109293779090341?fref=tsThere’s a Falkenberg in Lower Bavaria.
Which one is it? I guess I will have to do more research!… but we’re getting closer!

UPDATE, Feb. 15, 2022: I haven’t been able to rest recently. Several family researchers, distant cousins, keep coming up with more data on the KUHNS line in Milwaukee. So, for some reason, late last night I started doing research on Falkenberg, to see if I could determine once and for all, what part of Germany the Kuhns/Kuntz line immigrated from.
This time I did a search for “KUNTZ Falkenberg Bayern”. A website came up I’d never seen before, a private genealogy website, in German, “Familienforshung – Kunz, Weiden in der Oberpfalz“. Interesting. The researcher talked about Konz, Kontz, Kunz, Contz and other similar names from the Oberpfalz area. Normally, these names don’t get me excited, because they are SO different from the KUHNS / KUNTZ line I research. But something made me look.

Side Note: My wife later pointed out that, had I not gone on a mission to Switzerland and Germany in the 1970’s, and studied German in 1980 near Munich, I would have never been able to “see” the hints that appeared on the page. But because I know German, there were words and phrases that jumped out at me.

Quellen = Sources for Falkenberg KUNZ Research

For example, on the home page, the word “Quellen” seemed to jump out. “Sources”. So I clicked on the link, which took me to a list page of sources the researcher (Alfred KUNZ of Weiden, Germany, may he rest in peace) had used. As I scrolled down, a particular line jumped out at me:
b) Staatsarchiv Amberg: Nordamerikanische Auswanderer aus der Oberpfalz (1839 – 1871) — “Immigrants to North America out of Oberpfalz (1839 – 1871). Something in my memory stirred. My ancestors left “The Old Country” some time around 1840. I downloaded this record, a LARGE PDF file with hundreds of pages, thousands of listings. I searched KUHNS. Nothing. KUNTZ. Nothing. I wondered if I searched for “Falkenberg” if something would show up. Several listings, but not many. I determined to look at them all. Suddenly: “Johann KUNZ”. The next line: “Ehefrau + 6 Kinder”. “His wife + 6 children”, registered to leave Bavaria for North America.

Kunz family departure from Falkenberg, Bavaria, 1845

Something stirred. It was the wrong spelling, but still: How many of their children were born in Germany? I knew my genealogy file had the answer, so I looked up his family tree. Six children were born in Germany.

Another column showed the date this family left Germany: April, 1845. My heart sank. I was certain my family had arrived in Wisconsin in 1840. Still, one should always check the records. SURPRISE! The obits, the census records, and other records I’d recorded made it clear: The family arrived in Wisconsin in 1845! Still a possibility! I read other columns from the PDF record. “Occupation: Glasermeister”. Master of glass. Something stirred in me. Why did that sound familiar? I scanned through the obit in FamilySearch.org that I had posted. Nothing. But something said “There’s more.” I looked in my “Kuhns_KuntzOldNewspaperClippings” file. There was an obit I hadn’t posted on the website. “Old Settler Dead”. And it said: “In 1845 Mr. Kuhns with his family came to America to live. … In his native country he followed the occupation of glass cutting.”

There it was! A man with the correct first name, John (Johann), similar last name, KUNZ (instead of KUHNS or KUNTZ) leaves Falkenberg, Germany (a very small village, population in the hundreds) in 1845, arrives in Wisconsin the same year with his wife and 6 children. He and his wife are from Falkenberg, Bavaria, where he is a glass cutter. ALL those items (names, number of children, location, occupation) are substantiated on both sides of the ocean, both in Bavarian records and Wisconsin records.

I have found our family’s “Heimats Ort”, our home town. Of course, I have to research it! I find this: Hertzlich Willkommen in Falkenberg! A cute little Dorf (actually, a Markt) in the Tirschenreuth district of Oberpfalz, Bavaria.

Again, I’m weeping. I bi Heim!

As I was discovering all of this, I made a video, which I will post here later.

Departure Notice of Johann KUNZ from Falkenberg, Bavaria, 1845
More Falkenberg KUNZ Information

I wrote a long email to Alfred KUNZ, (unfortunately, Herr KUNZ passed away in the summer of 2024, before I could meet him), thanking him for his website and explaining my excitement. The next morning, he’d responded with a photo of an official notice from the Bavarian Kingdom Intelligenceblatt, an official notification for all persons concerned regarding the immigration of Johann KUNZ and his wife and six children to North America. The rough translation:

#343, published 13 March, 1845
“Let It Be Known.
Johann Kunz, Glassmaster from Falkenberg, has the intention, with wife and 6 children, to immigrate to North America.
It is required that all those who have dealings (or things to do with) this family, should appear Saturday, 12 April, morning 9 o’clock, under the _____ of the area/regional office, and register. (Listed) Tischenreuth on the 7th March, 1845, Royal (Bavarian) Landregion Tirschenreuth, ______ (Zimmer? Wimmer?)”

Alfred Kunz later wrote more of an explanation for the published notice: “Wer im 19. Jahrhundert nach Nordamerika auswandern wollte, brauchte dazu eine behördliche Erlaubnis, die beim zuständigen Gericht (Amtsgericht Tirschenreuth) beantragt werden musste.” 
“In the 1800s, whoever wanted to immigrate to North America had to get an official permission from the local authorities (Official Office Tirschenreuth).”

“Männer mussten ihren Militärdienst geleisten haben und die Auswanderer durften keine Schulden zurücklassen. Deshalb wurde ihre Absicht auszuwandern im Intelligenzblatt veröffentlicht.”
“Men had to have fulfilled their Military Service requirement, and the immigrants could not leave behind any debts or obligations. For this reason, their intention to immigrate was published in the Intelligenzblatt (newspaper).”

“Und eine Frist gesetzt, damit Ansprüche und Forderungen an die Auswanderer geltend gemacht werden konnten.” 
“And a bail posted, so that requirements and debts against the immigrants could be financially paid off.

AMAZING!

PS: If you are related or are from Falkenberg, Tirschenreuth, Bavaria, please contact me at da.kuhns at gmail dot com, or naturesguy at naturesguy dot com. Put in the subject line “Kuhns / Kuntz / Kunz family history” or something similar

HEIMATS ORT — HOMETOWN FALKENBERG — MORE UPDATES! Feb 16, 2022

I’ve gotten a lot of information from Alfred KUNZ and his website. He has also emailed me directly. We do not yet know if we are related, but he has been very helpful. I’ll continue to post updates here.

Yesterday he sent me a list of houses in Falkenberg, as well as their “new” address. He wrote: “nach der Häuseraufstellung Falkenberg von 1840 wohnte ihr Vorfahre Johann Kunz im Haus-Nr. 91. Die Anschrift ist heute: Marktplatz 4.”
“According to the Census of Houses in Falkenberg from 1840, your ancestor Johann Kunz lived in Haus Number 91. The address today is: Marktplatz 4.”

In the 1840 census, Johann KUNZ and his family lived at Marktplatz 4 in Falkenberg. Using GoogleEarth, I was able to put in the address and find an arial view of the house, across the street from the back corner of the church in the center of town. Using a street view, I was also able to see the front of the house. 

Marktplatz 4 is in the upper left corner of this photo, near the back of Pfarrkirche St. Pankratius in the center of Falkenberg. The Burg Falkenberg (castle, fortress) is just off the top center of the photo..
Marktplatz 4 is in the upper left corner of this photo, near the back of Pfarrkirche St. Pankratius in the center of Falkenberg. The Burg Falkenberg (castle, fortress) is just off the top center of the photo..
Street view of the front of Marktplatz 4, Falkenberg, Bavaria, the home (in 1840) of Johann KUNZ. The back of the  Pfarrkirche St. Pankratius church is visible on the left.
Street view of the front of Marktplatz 4, in Falkenberg, the home (in 1840) of Johann KUNZ. The back of the Pfarrkirche St. Pankratius church is visible on the left.

Directions to Falkenberg, Tirschenreuth in Oberpfalz, Bavaria, Germany

Now, of course, our family wants to go to Falkenberg. For reference, it is in the Oberpfalz area of Bavaria. NOTE: There are several “Falkenberg” towns in Germany, including a few in Bavaria. The best way to find the Kuhns / Kuntz / Kunz Heimat is to look on Google Maps for the County Seat (Landkreis) Tirschenreuth, Bavaria. Tirschenreuth is about 150 miles north-northwest of Munich, about 40 miles east of Bayreuth, and about 115 miles (by car) west of Prague, Czechia.

Falkenberg, which lies on the river Waldnaab (Bavarian: “Woidnaab”), is about 6 miles west of Tirschenreuth, on Highway 2167.

Another Bavarian Family Connection: Familie MARK und VOLLATH

About the same time (specifically, 18 February, 2022), I found someone on Ancestry and Family Search who was working on the same line as I was — with A LOT more information. So I wrote him.
Hallo! Ich weiss nicht, ob Sie Deutsch oder Englisch kann. Ich bin Amerikaner, so werde auf English schreiben. Hello! I don’t know if you speak German or English. I am an American, so I will write in English. (Falls ich muss auf Deutsch, kann ich das auch.)
I was looking for the parents of my ancestor, Viktoria Mark, of Bodenreuth, who married Johann KUNZ of Falkenberg, Bavaria, in Falkenberg in February, 1836. One of the witnesses was Johann Baptiste MARK, which you have listed in your family history, and the parents are Mathias Mark, Bauer in Bodenreuth und
Anna Maria, geb. Vollath von Pleisdorf. These are the people listed on your records.
How are you related to them? Johann KUNZ and Viktoria MARK are the great-grandparents of my Grandfather. They immigrated to Hartford, Wisconsin, USA from Falkenberg in 1845.
I am going to add your Mark and Vollath family records to my records, and I look forward to hearing more from you! Please contact me … and thank you!

A few days later, I got an email from Gerhardt RASP, a tax preparer from nearby Tirschenreuth (the county seat of Falkenberg, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz, Bayern, Deutschland).

Through various emails, and much research at the Pfarrkirche Falkenberg (Katholische) Kirche, he sent me many records, allowing me to take my KUNTZ/KUNZ family history WAY back, into the 1500s! THAT is amazing! He is truly a God-send, and I am blessed to have found him and Herr Kunz.

Relationship between Gerhard RASP and David KUHNS:

Georg Mathias Mark (born 1756, Bodenreuth, Tirschenreuth, Bavaria, Germany) married
Anna Vollath (born 1763, Pleisdorf, Neustadt an der Waldnaab), in the Pfarrkirche Falkenberg 24 Jan. 1790 (Gerhard Rasp and David Kuhns common great-great-great-great-grandparents)
Katharina Mark born 1797 in BodenreuthViktoria Mark born in 1813 in Bodenreuth, (married to Johann “Jacob” KUNTZ in Falkenberg, moved to Milwaukee / Hartford WISC, USA, 1845)
Franz Josef Mayerhöfer born 1839 in PirkEugene W. Kuntz born in Falkenberg, Bavaria
Barbara Mayerhöfer born 1886 in PirkJohn Kuntz born in Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Anna Mark, born 1925 in FalkenbergGeorge F. Kuhns born in Milwaukee
Rosemarie Stenzel, of Falkenberg/TirschenreuthGene L. Kuhns Sr. born in Milwaukee
Gerhard Rasp, born in Falkenberg David Kuhns (me) born in Milwaukee, WI, USA
Common MARK und VOLLATH ancestors from Kreis Tirschenreuth, Bayern, Deutschland

Familien Namen aus Falkenberg und Kreis Tirschenreuth, Bayern, Deutschland

Other Family Names from Falkenberg and Kreis Tirschenreuth and Neustadt an der Waldnaab, Oberpfalz, Bavaria, Germany

Family names included in the records from Falkenberg and the surrounding area of Kreis Tirschenreuth, and Neustand an der Waldnaab, Oberpfalz, Bavaria, Germany, include:

  • KUNTZ (ca. 1845 in Wisconsin, USA) KUNZ (*1766 Falkenberg), CONTZ (ca. 1740),
  • FAHRNBAUER (ca. 1740, of Falkenberg)
  • MARK (before 1500, Geißenreuth, Plößberg, Tirschenreuth)
  • VOLLATH and VOLLANDT (1500, Wurz, Püchersreuth, and Dietersdorf, Windischeschenbach, Landkreis Neustadt an der Waldnaab, Bayern, after 1619, Schnackenhof, Plößberg, Tirschenreuth)
  • WEIß (*1590, Gumpen, Falkenberg, Tirschenreuth),
  • HÄRTL (ca. 1495, Gründlbach, Tirschenreuth),
  • SCHNEIDER (ca. 1769 and ca. 1745, Wiesau),
  • TREMLER (vor 1630 Ilsenbach, Püchersreuth, Neustadt an der Waldnaab),
  • HÖNING (vor 1719 Albersrieth, Waldthurn, Neustadt an der Waldnaab),
  • SCHARNAGL, ca. 1590, Stein, (later Schönthan), Plößberg, Tirschenreuth)
  • MENZL (about 1630, Wildenau, Plößberg, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz)
  • HÖFLER or HOEFLER (before 1495, Geißenreuth, Plößberg, Tirschenreuth,)
  • BUSL (before 1500, Dürnkonreuth, (later Schönthan), Plößberg, Tirschenreuth),
  • KLINGER (abt 1552, Gründlbach, Tirschenreuth, Tirschenreuth),
  • DÖBERL (*1604, Laub; of Gründlbach)
  • ZIEGLER (*1605 Lodermühl, +of Gründlbach, Tirschenreuth)
  • LINDNER +1682 Plößberg, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz, and +1728, Dietersdorf, Windischeschenbach, Landkreis Neustadt an der Waldnaab)
  • PEIML (*1594, +1660, Hohenthan, Bärnau, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz)
  • SCHMID (+1689 Dietersdorf, Windischeschenbach, Neustadt an der Waldnaab, Oberpfalz)
  • BOGNER (about 1600, Neuhaus, Windischeschenbach, Landkreis Neustadt an der Waldnaab)
  • MÜLLER (about 1650, Mitterteich, Mitterteich, and Muckenthal, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz)
  • KELLNER (ca. 1645, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz)
  • [OCKL and OCKHEL] (vor 1505, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth)
  • FRÄNKEL (ca 1570, Rotzendorf, Püchersreuth, Landkreis Neustadt an der Waldnaab, Bayern
  • [CUNNZ, CUNTZ, CUNZ, KONZ], ca. 1550, Muckenthal, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth, Oberpfalz)
  • BUCHNER (ca. 1664, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth,)
  • ZEIDLER (+ca. 1650 Wiesau, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth)
  • ZEITLER (ca 1540 Kondrau, Waldsassen, Tirschenreuth)
  • ZINTL (about 1560, Schönfeld, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth)
  • KERN (vor 1530 Kondrau, Waldsassen, Tirschenreuth)

These are all names that, until October 2024, I’d never actually written down and looked at. They’re all from around Falkenberg, Wiesau, Tirschenreuth, and that area, except for a few around Neuhaus, Landkreis Neustadt an der Waldnaab.

UPDATE: Wir Reisen Nach Falkenberg! — We Are Going To Falkenberg!

We are going to Falkenberg! 8-24 of Oktober, 2024, Marnie and I will be traveling in Europe, mostly to visit family history sites in Germany and Switzerland:

  • 8-12 October: Falkenberg, Tirschenreuth, Weiden in Oberpfalz Bavaria, Germany
  • 12-14 October: Nieder Schönfeld, Ober Schönfeld, Altöls, and other areas in Kreis Bunzlau, Schlesien, where “Granny Geerdts” (Bertha Starke Geerdts, my grandmother Bertha Geerdts Kuhns’ mother) was born and went to school and church. It is now Krasnik Dolny, Poland)
  • 15-16 October: LDS Temple in Freiberg, Germany
  • 16-17 October: Prague, Czech Republic
  • 18-21 October: Switzerland, including Lustdorf, Stein am Rhein, and Zurich, where Marnie’s ancestors are from (15th and 16th century), including Hans R. Lavater, Bürgermeister (Mayor) of Zurich
  • 21-24 October: Other sight-seeing and flex time

If you are related to the KUNZ, KUNTZ, KUHNS, MARK, VOLLATH, STARKE, DAUSEL, DEHMEL lines in Germany (or Wisconsin), or the LAVATER, von SULZ, von WYSS, or WOHNLICH lines in Kanton Zurich or Thurgau, please let us know!

da.kuhns@gmail.com

Who Rescued Who: Prose Self-Analysis

People will see a good situation and either praise and glorify it or, like Iago in Othello, find fault and try to tear it down by small and manipulative ways.

So it is with my wife and my relationship. People tell me that they’ve never seen my wife so happy. They tell me she deserves me, that it’s about time a man came into her life who is worthy of her. They think I’ve inspired her to create her patriotic blog, and to grow her book publishing and consulting business. Yet others find reason to cast doubt on our relationship. They claim that we manipulate each other, that we’re just dishonest in our reasons that we got together.

Often when this happens, I question her, asking why they would say such things. I ask her again (and again and again) if she loves me for me, or if she just loved me and married me for the idea of me, to get someone to work with her, to get the house and the property back.

When I doubt like that, I cast my mind back on what Heavenly Father told me to do, and I immediately feel bad because I know Who led me to her. I know who inspired me to come to Chattanooga, to date her, to make the offer on her former house, to court her, and to marry her. I know who drives me daily to clean up the property, to write, to create, to build the kind of Inspired Life we are growing together.

But still sometimes the doubting words come out and I can tell I hurt her. Yesterday was one of those self-doubting conversations. Early this morning she responded. And I think her words are inspired and insightful. She said:

“People who think you rescued me have no clue who I am. I am the woman who, for over two decades, made up the difference with a husband who racked up debt and couldn’t hold a job that made half of what we needed financially to survive and raise six children. I’m the innovator who created the first online mall, the first article directory, who with God’s help built a six-figure business and still managed to keep a roof over my kids heads when Google killed it. I’m the woman who can monetize a dozen ways from Sunday.

I’m the woman who made it through another divorce and her mother’s death and never lost her faith in God, who was able to forgive and come out with a pure faith that my life was about to get amazing. I’m the woman who is satisfied with simplicity … I was happy with a little apartment I could keep clean and a supervisor to fix things. I’m the woman who lost all the monetary niceties and realizes that they don’t amount to a hill of beans. It’s all just stuff.

Some people think you rescued me. Others might think I rescued you. They think I rescued you from your loneliness, from scouring the Western states for a woman who had depth and strength and wisdom and spirituality and a passion for life that matched your own. They might say I’m the one who introduced you and brought you to a piece of property you love so much you can’t resist working on it every day. They might feel that I brought you to something better than you ever hoped or dreamed of — something to channel all your energy and passion and your love of nature into.

Many might also say that I’m the one who rescued you from lonely nights and days and who loves you like you’ve never been loved before. That I’m the one who builds you up and helps you see the beauty in your uniqueness and who helps you find your tribe. That I’m the one who helps you see that you’re a sexy Greek god and a super model.

In my community of personal growth and self help, many who know both of us may think I’m the one who rescued you from your limited view of yourself, and many of your self doubts and insecurities. They might see that I’m the one who believes in you and believes in us and the miracle that God did in bringing us together.

Who Rescued Us?

The truth is that I’m the one who doubts not, fears not, worries not, questions not, because I know that it really was not you that rescued me. It was not me that rescued you. I see the Finger of the Lord in it all.

Let others say what they will. I know God, and I know what He did. And He is the one who rescued us both and gave us each other. And when you pause, when you stop listening to others, when you dive deep into your heart and soul the way you do, you know it is He who is creating this amazing life for both of us.

It’s time we stop doubting, rehashing and second guessing the past. It’s time we get busy with faith. It’s time we focus on being what God brought us together to be.

She’s right. I know the truth. I know who drives this relationship, why we often get simultaneous inspiration. I know who rescued both of us, even after we’d done all the self work (alone) to get ourselves into good places. When we were ready, He brought us together. I know Who is guiding us, Who is helping us discover, create and deliver our God-given purpose (which, ironically, is to help others discover, create and deliver their inspired messages). I know Who rescued us from being ordinary, Who reveals His Will to us individually and collectively on the daily, and Who is helping us do His will to help His children.

And now I have written a piece that, when people doubt, when people question, when people criticize who we are and why we are together, I can simply say:

I’ve written a blog post on that very topic.

Looking Back Lamentation

Today
I dusted off my writings,
walked through decades
of thought,
broken hearts,
emotions plus and minus.

Today
I gathered observations,
some of my best wonderings
from wanderings.

Bemused,
I smiled and grimaced
at both the genius
and the foolish silliness
that my fingers
had pounded or caressed
out of a dozen keyboards.

Mostly,
I question
not what I wrote,
nor that I wrote,
but what happened?
Why have I —
my fingers,
my mind,
my soul,
my heart —
gone
cold and silent?

This question perplexes me,
yet does not need to be answered.
The why
is not as important
as the turning from it,
the change,
the regeneration
of the creative flame.
The moving on.

The how?
I’m doing it now.