Red Shoes Crepe Drool: Romantic ImproVerse Haiku

I was worried my/
drool would tarnish her red shoes./
It wasn’t from crepes.

Judge Not: Romantic ImproVerse Haiku

She tried to gauge my/
spiritual intelligence,/
but hers was messed up.

Maybe she didn’t/
want tamales, but to me/
they’re mu Bueno!

One goes to worship/
at the Temple. One sleeps with/
others. Such a choice!

When you love someone/
and they say: “Go to Hell!,” you/
hope they are not there.
Or
and they say: “Go to Hell!,” they/
are there already.

Staring at a read/
screen, with no answers in sight,/
doesn’t calm my fears.

How much time did she/
spend on me? How much effort
did she spend on him?

When I see candy,/
I wonder if she also/
remembers my warmth.

With his spilling* still/
in her sheets, there’s no reason/
for me to be there.
Or
*sweetness

It’s very hard to/
call your daughter and leave her /
a “Goodbye” voice mail.