Women Speak Truth: Romantic ImproVerse Haiku Lament

When a woman says/
that you are a waste of her/
time, just believe her.

Not Irelephant To Her: Romantic ImproVerse Haiku

I found a necklace/
most will call irelephant./
She doesn’t think so.
OR
I found a necklace/
most would call irelephant./
I don’t think she will.

When your heart truly/
is breaking, you can’t really/
write about it much.

I love having old/
men home teachers*. They serve with/
riding lawn mowers.

OR
*ministers.

I’m interesting./
I’m available. I must/
get my meds. Now what?!?

Why
do I
stand outside
and wave
at passing trains?

It’s what Dave
did
as a kid.
Why
should I
change?

My feet are cracked. Pain./
It’s what you get from dancing/
Barefoot in deserts.

When she says to call/
earlier but she’s not there/
’til later, you lose.

When you are the Lord’s/
servants, it is good to work/
and serve on Sunday.

So many people
tell me I’m a great dad. If
only my kids would.