Service Project Hypocrite: Revolutionary ImproVerse Haiku

When I advocate/
for service projects but then/
I don’t show up? Fail.

Earth Lover Hypocrite: Revolutionary ImproVerse Haiku

I said she should take/
off her sandals to connect/
with Earth. I didn’t.

If I really cared/
about her, I wouldn’t do/
half the things I do.
OR

If I cared about/
her, I wouldn’t do half the /
things I do to her.

If we complain of/
no reverence in church, are we/
not also guilty?
Or
not guilty of noise?

Her request to stay/
in touch won’t mean much when she’s/
out on a late date.

She was my friend. How/
can I judge her for sinning/
how I used to sin?
OR
She was my friend. How/
can I judge her for doing/
what I used to do?

Of course I am a/
hypocrite. I don’t do what/
I should. But I try!