Dump versus Dumped: Romantic Email Haiku

It’s easier to/
dump her than have her dump me … /
and much less painful.

Unexpected Winneconne Bohemian Rhapsody: Revolutionary ImproVerse Haiku

Standing on frozen/
shores, arms outstretched, “Any way /
the wind blows.” I’m there.

I’m gonna be sick./
He is so slick, throwing out/
sweet words* like St. Nick.

OR
*flirts

Just ‘cuz I’m wearing/
shorts and a T-shirt, doesn’t/
mean it’s warm outside.

Who needs Piano/
Guys? In a church in Oshkosh,/
talents brought tears.

There must be reasons*/
for silence. For ignoring.
But I don’t know them.
OR

There are good reasons*/
for silence. For ignoring.
But I don’t know them.

Weird,
that moment when
U realize
U haven’t looked yourself
in the eyes 4 4ever,
and U wonder:
“Where U been?”

I’ll support, sustain/
and respect those who try to/
protect and defend.

Maybe today is/
the day we stop hating cops/
and give them respect.

(Sung to the tune of “Rudolph the Red-Nose Reindeer”)

Well I’ve known brunettes
and redheads, accountants and funny ones.
Short ones and tall ones
and ones with hair bleached by the sun.

But do I recall
the greatest lover of all?

Not yet.